Tour of My Existence

Is this gonna work?

Now, we are coming towards the end of holy month of Ramadhan. Then, we’ll celebrate Raya, the peak of fasting month, in accordance to the successful of patiently facing the month of Ramadhan. Soon after that, we'll proceed with our life routine, work and having fun with no boundaries. The world will once again face the reality of human nature, our nature of living with no law and restrictions; bound to no one. I guess I’ll have to wait for another year for Ramadhan to come, to be able to see the true calmness flow-of-the-world with no worries. I wonder if I still have the time to do it next year. Insya' Allah.


This year, it is kind of special to me, because I haven’t had fast break with my family for 5 years, since my first year in college, in not-so-rural-area, Skudai, Johor. And the last time I had my Raya Celebration was three years ago, that was only because my father mistakenly had booked a flight ticket for me.

Fasting and celebrating Raya at home and college is a big difference, because;

1. At home, you don't need to think what to buy for fast break, because everything has been prepared for you. Since I'm currently working, once in a while, I'll buy something for our family's fast break. However, when I was in college, I need to think where to buy the meals for fast break. Sometimes, the only thing I had for fast break is an instant noodle, done in 5 minutes or so.

2. Fasting in college means that you have to be independent. You have to look out for yourself. You have to manage your time properly. You'll learn how to manage yourself. Unfortunately, there were a few times when I wasn't able to wake up early in the morning for my "sahur"(Ramadhan pre-dawn meal). So, I just had to wait till evening for my fast break to kick in and fills my stomach. While doing so, usually energy will goes down, so I was easily sleepy during my classes. Luckily, at home, my mum always tries to wake us for our sahur before the time comes. Alhamdulillah, I managed to get up at all time, even though sometimes I woke up pretty late, just fifteen minutes before "Imsak"(the time to stop eating sahur).

3. After a while, I realized that celebrating Raya in college doesn't feel like raya at all. No sound of firecrackers could be heard. No one install lightings to their rooms, like what people usually does to their homes. No TVs and no radios, where I could at least watch Raya advertisement or listens to Raya songs. In the end, I had no mood for Raya. Just stuck in my room doing what I love the most, watching movies and playing computer games.

4. In the morning, after Raya prayer, what I usually does is to get some meals to celebrate Raya on my own. Luckily, my friend, mohd-lajie loaned me his motorbike at the time. Otherwise, I wouldn't have a transport to go anywhere. My mum had also sent me some "kueh Raya" (Raya cakes) a week before Syawal arrives. So, at least I had something that remind myself of home. Then like always, I watched movies and played games. I wanted to visit some of my friends who lives in Johor, but their houses were too far. Some takes even a 2-hour drives. With just a bike at hand, I was afraid that something could go wrong and I might stuck some place which I wasn't familiar with. So, I stayed.

Celebrating Raya and Fasting during the month of Ramadhan thought me the most important thing in my life, Independent. It thought me how to be brave and how to do things on your own but at the same time having fun with it. Believe it or not, I misses the time when I was there. Probably, I'll do it again when I'll further my study. But not soon. I think I want to find out my passion in life, so that I know what would be the best platform for me to study.