Tour of My Existence

I won't do it. I don't want to do it.
Some of you might think.
Isn't that great. Being able to change the past.
Change your present and future in the process. And change your destiny.
But, I won't do it. For whatever reason it is.

I admit. There are times when I really want to change the past.
Change the actions that I've made. Correct things that I did wrong.
But, when I think it through. There are reasons for things that happened.
Lessons that I've learned made me matured.
And mistakes that I've made me better. Better as a person, and better as a human.
Without those priceless experiences, I don't think I made it through this far.

DeLorean DMC-12, a well-known time machine from the Back To The Future Trilogy. [source]

In the past, I've made mistakes. I've made wrong decisions.
It made me who I am today.
But there are times, I am really regret doing so.
Doing something, which I couldn't forget.
No matter how much I tried. It just won't go away.
So, if I have the ability to change the past, why don't I do it?
Try to change the past. Make it better.

Well, here is the catch. Nothing is easy as it seems.
What if a slightest change in the past, totally changes your life?
What if those changes make things more difficult, make it worse?
And what if those changes made you a new YOU?

You, who learns somethings differently.
You, who develops a different personality.
You, who exposed the other side of you, the dark side of you.

So, don't expect, the past doesn't matter. Because it does.
It does decides who you are today. The present of YOU.

While there are happy memories, that I wish I could go back into.
Doing it over and over again. Experiencing those sweet moments for one more time.
But don't forget, there are also bad memories. Bad dreams and nightmares.
Losing your family. Got dumped. Being involved in accidents.
I am for sure, don't want to go through that again. Over and over again.
Once is enough. A second chance doesn't make it better.
Even though it seems, happy moments are worth fighting for.
But the fear of those bad memories will always take over.

No matter how hard I tried, this will always be our last class together.

And, let's not forget. Some things are better left alone. Better left forgotten.
Just let it be. Buried deep inside at some part of our memory.
To open up a wounded part, is just making it worse.
It just going to leave a scar. Leaving a mark, that is hard to get rid off.
In the end, you'll just realize that you are just hurting yourself.
And the only cure, is the time factor.
Only time, the healer that you need to get some closure.
A closure, to unwanted past. A past, that you don't want to remember.